...until summer came. Yes, I am still not having a great summer yet because it was just once that I hit the beach and I didn't stay long enough, but even if I liked that I could wear a swimsuit in the public place still made me a bit uncomfortable and wished I didn't go all lazy the entire first quarter of the year.
I told myself I will make a comeback this month, and that I surely will do.. but first up, an update on my weight:
Mid April I was 196lbs., which means I gained 4lbs in the last two weeks. Well, it was expected. I wasn't exercising that much, I was eating more than I should, and I was sitting in front of my net book way too long. Actually, with all the slacking, I was expecting to gain more than that, but I guess I should just be thankful that I only gained 4lbs. That means, I still am holding my promise to not go over 200lbs.
If there's one thing to be thankful for, it's the realization that I can now wear pants size 36 inches at the waist. Still a big waistline, yes... but would you believe my biggest waist size was 42 inches? When I entered college in 1996, parents bought me jeans I could use and most of my pants were size 38. Next school year I was already wearing size 40 and it has been my waistline since then. Even when I reached 42 inches I would try to wear the 40-inch pants by sucking my tummy in. Most times, I'd just go for the garterized pants.
This pair of shorts I was wearing on the pictures above I bought just last Saturday. It was cheap so I bought it - if it doesn't fit, I can use it as my motivation to lose more weight, but I was just so thankful it did fit me good. Knowing that I can finally say good bye to my 40-inch pants gives me the good morale boost to push on.
Plans for this month? Just allow myself to come back into my old slender-y habits. I will gradually reduce food intake 'til I reach the amount of food I used to eat, I will start doing my morning walks and incorporate Hip Hop Abs, and I will get back to all the little programs I set myself to do - Lyn's Challenge and The Beck Diet Solution.
Ultimately, I will focus on myself. Yes I have a very awesome boyfriend who consistently checks on me, but I have to instill in my mind that my wellness is not in the hands of other people. I am the one responsible for my well being, so this journey has to be as personal as personal can be. I am doing this for myself, so I should not depend on the others, too.
Oohhh... a before and after moment:
This picture was taken February 2009 during a side trip to Tanjay, Negros Oriental. This was one of the "unpublished" images of myself (until now) because I found myself way too big and that the fat around my belly area was so hideous. The pair of shorts I was wearing fit just fine (it was size 18), but sometime in 2010 and 2011, it became so small to me that I nearly wanted to throw it away. It was the very few walking shorts I own, so I held on to it, and glad I did, because now I can finally do this...
Me wearing the same clothes three years after. I still am fat, my tummy is still fat... but the shorts are now big on me. Still not big enough to fall off my hips as I do have a very big hip area, but I am now saying goodbye to this pair of shorts because it is now big on me. Weird right? I used to throw away clothes because they're small, now I am disposing clothes because they're big.
The shirt I have on didn't have a tag; it was one of mom's blouses that she gave to me... and mom does take out all the labels on her clothes, so I don't know who made it, but the denim shorts I was wearing on the top part of this post is by American Eagle Outfitters, while the pale blue shorts I was wearing on the "before and after" is by Cherokee. Foot wear? Skechers on the top part, Crocs on the middle part, Havaianas on the bottom part.
It's time for me to get really serious.